This is said with a lot of love and also a gentle kick on the booty too.
If you’re still stuck on your ex — even though you know you should be moving on — I want you to know something really important:
You’re not broken. You’re not weak. You’re just entangled in something deeper than logic can explain.
I get it. I’ve been there.
On the outside, I looked like I had it together. I was functioning. Working. Smiling. Saying things like, “It’s all part of the journey” and “Time heals.”
But inside? I was looped. Exhausted. Still feeling angry. Still feeling them in my field. Still hurting. Still scared.
And I couldn’t work out why I wasn’t moving on.
Here’s what I now know that I didn’t know back then:
This pattern — of not letting go—might not even be yours.
If you grew up in a household where your parents struggled to let go, where grief lingered, or where emotional expression was shut down, you might have learned that holding on equals love. That clinging is caring. That to let go means you failed, or you didn’t try hard enough, or you’re unlovable.
So here you are, months (maybe years) later — still carrying the weight of a relationship that ended, but never left.
You tell yourself you’re fine. You play affirmations. You watch YouTube videos. You listen to podcasts. You try to “think your way” into healing.
I did this for months. Honestly, it made me feel better for a few hours, then I was back at square one.
Why? Because I wasn’t feeling the two core emotions underneath everything:
Hurt.
And scared.
There’s often shame around admitting this, especially if you’re the “strong one.” But babe, feeling hurt and scared doesn’t make you weak. It makes you human.
What also kept me stuck for so long? I was still energetically linked to him. There was still a hook. A cord. A piece of me still latched onto the “what if,” the hope, the grief, the memories.
And here’s the truth:
That connection will remain in place as long as you allow it to. Not consciously — of course, you want to move on. But energetically, if you haven’t cleared the imprint, it lingers. It keeps the door cracked open. And it continues to drain your life force.
It wasn’t until I worked with someone to actually clear the energy that things started to shift. Not in a “light-a-candle-and-hope” kind of way — I mean truly cut the cords, call my energy back, and feel myself return to the present moment.
The change was undeniable.
I had more energy. More clarity. I stopped dreaming about him. I could finally breathe again. I didn’t realise how much space that relationship was taking up — until I released it.
So if you’re still in the loop, please let me say this gently but clearly:
Don’t waste months like I did trying to figure it all out by yourself.
You’re not meant to do this alone. This isn’t about being dramatic or overthinking — this is about honouring the emotional, mental, and energetic reality of what it means to let go truly.
You can clear this in just a few sessions.
And from there, you begin to meet the version of you who is healed. Who is joyful? Who is present? Who finally has the space to call in what’s next, not from neediness, but from wholeness.
You’re not crazy for still feeling it.
But you also don’t have to stay in it.
When you decide to let go — truly let go—you reclaim your power. And babe, the peace that comes with that is priceless.
With love,
Emma x
